2010 in review...

 To start 2011 off right I thought to put together my 2010 achievements and lessons learned together. Something to give me hope, to nudge me forward, in my search for...I don't know what. Maybe by the time I've put this list together I'll have seen a pattern. This list is off the cuff.

(+) = Achievement

(*) = Lesson Learned / Will find time to refocus in 2011 and get better at it.

+ Organized and decorated my sanctuary/craft room/den/office.

+ Had two lovely out-of-country guests.

* Got frustrated with writing and stopped.

+/* Started having dreams and nightmares again.

+ Hosted Thanksgiving and Christmas at our house.

+ Practiced Yoga for 3-6 days a week for about 7 weeks straight.

+ Realized that the reason I love Yoga is that it is all about me, for me, and that is OK.

+/* Started working with the body that I have rather than planning to work with the body I want.

* Made excuses to not practice Yoga at least every other day.

+ Meditated more regularly

+Read and loved Judith Lasater's Living Your Yoga

+ Learned the concept of self compassion.

* Did not practice self compassion for long.

+ Restarted my practice 

* Stopped my practice shortly thereafter with more excuses

+Picked up knitting again and completed 5 hats, 1 scarf.

+Crocheted one very large couch blanket for snuggling

+ Failed to mail said blanket in December as a gift.

+Decided to apply to an MSW program to get out of my rut and start working towards what I want in life rather than settling for what I have. ( I want to be a professor at a university.)

+Walked my dog about 10 or so times

* Got freaked out by psychodog and her drunker owner

* Let fear of psychodog and not knowing how to fend her off stop me from walking my dog ( I wonder if Tazers work on dogs)

* Made more lame excuses not to walk my dog ( thank god I have a husband who walks her!)

* Criticized other dog owners for tying their dogs out and not walking them.

+ Realized I was being a big fat hypocrite.

+ Had a good cry.

+  Dental Health is on track

+  Flossing is now routine ( I still hate it)

+ Saved enough money to take a wonderful trip back east in November, met some amazingly good people, and spent some time with one of my best friends ever.

+ Decided it is time for a change

* Continued to smoke cigarettes

+ Barely drank at all.

+ Made a delicious Cornbread stuffing in the crock pot of all places.

+ Allowed myself to be uncomfortable and survived.

* Allowed my depression to affect my work performance.

+ Ordered a wonderful Hiking Book for my husband and bookmarked the trails I think we would enjoy.

+ Stood up for myself even if I spoke a little too loudly, baldly, and said things that other people just did not want to face. 

+ Taught relaxation techniques to Substance Abusers who still request it 2x a week.

* Still talking about that Mountain Bike I crave to own and ride ( god I love biking)

+ Managed to put a little more trust into my father.

* Didn't see my mom often enough.

* Realized that children may not be in the cards for me and my husband.

+ Stuck to my guns about not taking hormones to try and get pregnant.

+ Ate more veggies 

+ Saw several movies at the theaters with my husband O and our friends Beth and Sean  who have moved far far away.

+ Realized not all Indian food is good.

+ Became much more confident in my knitting.

* Didn't see enough live music

+ Made really good chili

+ Made treats for Christmas but not too many.

* Didn't take enough pictures.

*Didn't make enough phone calls to people I care about.

+ Held my tongue 

+ was impulse impaired a few times less than 2009.

+ Addressed issues in a more adult way.

+ Continued to strive toward Child-like versus Child-ish.

* Did not get any bodywork.

* Did not give any bodywork to humans.

* Did not get more than one pedicure.

+ Continued to be a person who does not share other peoples secrets.

+ Enjoyed Playtime with Em

+/* Still not sure how marriage works and sometimes feel like we're headed in different directions.

 

 At the start of the list I felt like I was flogging myself, but then realized that while another year has passed I am still alive, breathing, taking in sustenance, and able to make changes. To make them slowly, subtly, will be the key. And so as 2011 gets moving I have plenty of opportunity to move forward and make the slow changes that are required to make me happier , more at peace with myself, and with others.

2011 The Year of House and Home Renewal

I don't buy into making "New Years Resolutions" but I do make goals for myself to accomplish in the next year.

2011 seems to be the year of the House for me. Our home needs some help, updating, and replacing of old worn out things that we have held on to because they worked for us. We should be getting our window flashing replaced sometime in this new year. That's an odd thing to be vague about, but our property manager was an incompetent fool that could never give a straight answer and our HOA board seems to be as non-committal. Bad combination so the property manager was fired and we have retained a new management company that started work today! So here is to hoping that mess gets figured out sometime this spring!

Then there are my knitting and crochet projects. I usually have myself on a 2 project diet, but it got a little out of control with the holidays and now I have no idea where I stand. I know I have 2 ribbed hats on needles, one is on DPNs and I am slowly finishing that up. The other is almost ready for DPNs as well. Both are for other people and I would like to get them complete this winter so that they can be used! Another hat I told a friend I would make for her, but the yarn that was bought was complete crap and I had to buy something different. It has not made it onto needles as of yet.

I also have a swap that I am doing and now that it is after the holidays- well not quite, but it will be soon. I will need to finish her hat. It is the Fish Hat [Dead or Alive] .I love this pattern! I did not start it on DPNs as the pattern says. I used a 16" circular and I used a US size 8 rather than the 7 the pattern calls for. It is a fun pattern! I am also making one of these for my nephew, but I imagine he wont be getting it until I can get those 3 other projects completed.

And then I have a ripple throw that I am working on. It has been intended for my nephew, but Crochet kills my wrists something fierce and I had to abandon it when it was only 12 or so rows in. But I have since re-evaluated my mania for needlecraft. I love doing it and so I will go on these marathons of knitting or crochet. No more marathons and I am just working a row or two each night.  Knitting does not irritate my wrists nearly as much as the motions of crochet, but I ache just the same when I spend 4-6 hours doing it . Duh!

The Gap Cowl

While we were in Philadelphia our lovely hosts took us on a tour of Penn. What a beautiful campus! In my dreams I would have gone to a campus covered in Ivy with a statue of Ben that I could eat my lunch with. The imaginary talks we could have! I used to share my lunch with the same one footed bird every Tuesday and Thursday so sharing it with Ben would be a treat!

 As we were getting out of the car I spotted a wonderful cowl in The Gap (sadly their site says that it is unavailable!). I ran in and checked the stitch, the width of the garment and walked out a very happy knitter. "Ha! I can make that and it won't cost near the price!"I do love the fact that my yarn addiction has made me a very thrifty shopper.

 We've been home for about 2 weeks now and someone has already come up with the pattern! I love Revelry Knitters! They are such kind and sharing folks!

Squirrel!

Being from Phoenix, AZ I don't get to see one of these often. I freak when I get to see a jack rabbit. Just imagine the excitement when I saw this little guy. We went to NewYork City and Philadelphia in November. There were plenty of squirrels in central park, but Christ Church Burial Ground in Philadelphia was positively crawling with these cute little guys! We got to utilize our hats and they kept us warm and oh so cozy. Thing is I couldn't handle 10 days away from my knitting needles....I came prepared for the onset of the symptoms. And started another hat. another 4x4 rib, in a lovely purple, green, teal, variegated yarn.

I loved our vacation! I really loved meeting all the boardies that came out to see us and the folks we stayed with. But I was ready to come home and see my dawg. I missed her so much! I was so excited in fact that I *lost* the hat! We had not checked in 24 hrs ahead of time for the flight so we were stuck in the 2nd and 3rd last rows of the plane. I was blessed by sitting in front of some kid of about 10 or 11 years old that went stir crazy an hour into the flight and began to play musical chairs. Up-hair pull-down-hair pull-up-hair pull- down hair pull. Then he began to kick the backs of the seats! It was a lovely flight. So by the time we actually got to get off the plane I was BURSTING with a bit of irritation and a TON of excitement to go get the lovely dawg from her kennel. I shoved the bag of yarn and needle into a free space in one of the suitcases, or I thought I did. By the time we put away the suitcases no yarn, half finished hat, or needles had been found =O

24 hours later my husband found them! WHEW! I was way more upset about losing the needles then the hat.

During my mad crazed search for historical sites (there are many in Philly) I came across some lovely urban crochet! 

These were across the street from the design school in center city. 

Yarn everywhere and none I want to use

It seems that once a month I post. It's nothing personal. I just do not think of it, but since Autumn is upon us (finally) and winter is just round the bend my knitting needles have come out. And I have completed 2 hats since the beginning of September. One for my husband from limulusknits  which is a 4x4 rib. Its a nice hat, a little wonky towards the end ( I think I was tired of dpns) and one for me from i dream of knitting. His hat is a a little short for his head, I will have better luck next time! And mine is a little too long. I suppose I added too many rows of seed stitch. Again "Oh well, better luck next time." The hat itself is adorable and I imagine when my hair is curly ( as I sometimes wear it) I will be thankful for the little extra give to the fabric.

Some time ago I purchased some Noro Silk Garden because I liked the colors ( a sucker for variegated yarn) and brought it home. Its been sitting in my stash, in its ball and now I take it out I don't really care for it. I am going to make yet another hat from it I think. I love hats, not that here in sunny Phoenix,AZ you actually need them, but I like them. And best of all they are easy and fast to whip up.  

Emotember

I have struggled to write a coherent post lately. Mostly I forget until its late and nearly time for bed, so I say to myself I will do it tomorrow. Tomorrow has become September. Oops!


I also propose that September be changed to Emotember (stolen idea from a board member- thanks!) as most people, it seems, are having a case of the mondays all month long. I am not excluded from this. I train interns. And one of my interns recently snapped his fingers at a coworker of mine to make a point for her to email him with a scheduled appointment.Eeeek! He is lucky she did not rip him to shreds as I know she is capable of. I have seen the feisty little woman make her voice be heard more than once! I snap at my dog to get her to heel. But she is NOT a human being! Oy! And so the drama of my special intern has begun. He is just over-eager and really wants a lot of control in our little office. He will soon find control = an individual session. And that will be uncomfortable. So to extend a hand I am going to sit down with him later this week and "break the ice." Try to loosen him up a bit and remind him to have a sense of humor. We are humans working with other humans who have terrible problems. We have to have a sense of humor. But i also know there are some pre-conceived notions that all interns come in with. Our clinic serves a homeless substance abusing population and there is a lot of judgment out there and I have yet to meet an intern in my 5 years who want to work substance abuse. Sad, but true. 

I have been busy planning a trip to the northeast to see friends and do history geektastic stuff, like go take silly pictures with the statues of the Continental Congress in Philadelphia, eat at the City Tavern (Martha Washington's Turkey Pot Pie here I come!) and wander New York City and central park. We are meeting several friends in Connecticut then road tripping to New York City, meeting up with more friends, wandering the city, then another road trip to Philadelphia to see more friends. Our flights were cheap! We are paying a total of $300 for a hotel and the rest of the money will be spent frugally. We are still saving for Europe, but I needed to get out of here.  So as of right now the trip total is in the comfortable range. The last trip out east was a killer on our wallet : O

I don't think that will happen this time!

Travel Bug

I have got a serious travel bug.  Not hard to figure out why I have this niggling, I haven't left the state in 2 years. Blurgh. That is too long. But we are in the middle of some major fix-its and travel right now would just deplete our funds. So we figure out other cheaper ways to entertain ourselves. They work most of the time, but I can't wait until these expenses are paid and we can continue to save to get out of here.

 We are sincerely trying to avoid touching much of our savings and stick with the one car without the  payment for as long as we can- this means for as long as I can handle it before I demand to have a second car so I can roll into work later than 5am. But for as much as I *hate* my schedule I do find that getting work over and done with that early in the day is really nice. So I get up and go at 3:20 ( I've  pushed it back 10 minutes lately- too hard to face the world at 3:10am.)

Recently, I have been torturing myself, looking at travel websites and "planning" cruises or just 4 day weekends at amusement parks. I haven't been to an amusement park since....since I was a teenager! The last was Disney when I was 19. But this would be Universal Studios in Orlando to go to the Wizarding World of Harry Potter. I am such a dork where Harry is concerned.

But the powers that be have reminded me we have a couple of commitments that cannot be put on the back burner....SXSW 2011 and the move of one mother in law. Oh and a wedding for one of my best friends, who apparently wants a bachlorette party in Las Vegas. 2 major expenses that I am not sure I can even pull off right now or in the next year with all these other expenses that are taxing us.  So we save and save. We are still waiting on the HOA to approve our "construction defect" repairs and a bathroom that needs some love. After those are done I sure hope that we can get our butts to Europe. So tired of waiting on this. And I'd like to do it before England's damp and cold could stop me from acting like a kid.

We have looked at a 7 night cruise of the Mediterranean  then taking a train north to Paris ( I have to see Versailles, Jardin des Tuileries, the Louvre, and the Marais neighborhood) then over to London and then up to Edinburgh. I am not sure if the cruise will be at the end or start of the trip yet, but a 10 day trip just turned into 21 days. I am not complaining. The poor dog will need to go to Pete and Mac's as I cannot leave her with family and I cannot shut her up in a kennel for that long. Pete and Mac's would provide doggie day care and playtime for 6 hours each day. I haven't found another kennel that can do that nor one she is as happy at as she is at Pete and Mac's. Last time she was happy to see us, but didn't want to come home! haha. In my mind that is better than the alternative where she just gets to lay in a kennel and get a walk a couple times a day.   This is going to be an expensive trip, but aren't all trips to Europe somewhat expensive? Funny, the cruise is the cheapest part!